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Misperceptions about anger management
It’s time to clear up some misconceptions about anger management. It’s all guys. No it isn’t. Anger is an equal opportunity defense mechanism, and women are as troubled by it as men. They are all out of control. Well, yes. When they are in the grip of a rage attack,...
Why you don’t need anger management
If a top-down admonition to breathe deeply and calm down worked, you wouldn’t be searching for anger management help. Nanoseconds before the outburst of anger, your nervous system flashes over with feeling. Some patients go to pieces inside, and then the rage is an...
The Neuroscience of Panic and Fear
Before you seek help for your for panic or fear, know the brain-based differences between the two. Then you can get help that works. Jaak Panksepp is a researcher who has delineated two places in the brain which process different kinds of fear and call for different...
Acting: It’s a career, not a diagnosis
Attention mental health workers everywhere. Here’s some unsolicited supervision from a actress who cashed in her chips 20 years ago and became a psychotherapist. Acting is a career choice, not a diagnosis of unmet childhood narcissistic needs. Good acting channels the...
When therapy isn’t great: good psychotherapy vs. bad psychotherapy
Therapy isn’t always kismet. You sift through the practitioner’s websites, meet up with a couple, and choose the one you like the best. Or the one that’s on your plan. Or the one whose office is nearby. After about six months, you may end up realizing…it’s not...
Good psychotherapy, bad psychotherapy: More on therapy that isn’t great.
Bad psychotherapy feels just like your worst nightmare. Good psychotherapy feels new. The difference between the two often comes down to your therapist’s work with transference. What’s transference? It’s a tissue of assumptions, no-fly zones, deepest wishes and...
The difference between anger and rage
At first glance, anger and rage might appear the same, with rage being a bit louder and longer than anger. The inner experience of these states or emotions is entirely different. Anger Sharpens ability to think Connects with others Defines the self Rage Thinking...
Anger and rage: A search for solutions
Here are some ways to begin the search for answers if you are experiencing overwhelming feelings of anger and rage. Blood work. If you haven’t had a physical in a while, make an appointment. Make sure that your doctor knows that you are feeling irritable. There are...
Find out what goes on at day camp: Have a real conversation
Every Mom wants her child to feel loved and special. You want your children to know how important they are to you. Here’s a framework for how to listen to your children to show you care. • Be specific. “How was your day?” is the obvious question, but you are likely to...
Show your friends you care by listening
Everyone wants to be a better friend. You want the people in your life to feel cared for. You want them to know that they are important to you. Here’s a framework for how to listen in to a friend to show you care. Shut up. People love to talk about themselves. ...
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